Thursday, May 17

I have an exciting announcement to make: on June 1, we will be welcoming a new family member into our home. No, silly, we're not having a baby (if we were, and it was due June 1, we've been doing a great job of hiding it). Here's what I'm talking about...

Meet Stanley, the Shih Tzu/chihuahua cross. He's six weeks old (he'll be eight when we get him), and he's being housebroken and trained even as we speak at a kennel in Aldergrove where he was born and hand-raised by the owners.

We found him totally by fluke. Some of you might know that we've been casually looking for a dog since we returned, but haven't had much luck with it. We were going back and forth on the pros and cons of going to a breeder, but we figured that in the end, there was no point in paying extra for accreditation when we have no interest in showing or breeding the dog--we just want a family pet. The benefit of a breeder, of course, is that you know exactly what you're going to get (with a reputable breeder, at least). With adoptions, especially of strays, you never know quite what the temperament is going to be like, and with a young child, it's a little scary.

The other problem with the shelter is that the majority of the dogs in the shelters are large. This is evidently because some people get a large dog as a puppy and don't quite realize how big it's going to get. Once it gets too big, it's off to the shelter. You know, it just seems to me that common sense would dictate that you check on how big the dog is going to be as an adult before you get him, but that falls into the never-give-out-sensitive-personal-information-on-the-internet category--you'd think that nobody would actually do it, but you're surprised at how many people do.

Back to the overarching narrative. As we were driving to another shelter here in town, we drove past this particular kennel. Over their main sign out front hung a banner that said, "ADOPTION." I wasn't sure if that meant they had dogs for adoption, or if perhaps they were advocating adoption as a method of dog ownership, so we stopped in. Sure enough, the owner was just coming downstairs with the litter (six puppies in all), and we just loved them. Although my wife wanted to make a decision on the spot, we thought it best to go home and talk it over. We did a bit of supplementary research on the breed (we had already considered them before, given that Shih Tzu's are hypoallergenic), and decided we'd go for it. So we went back and put in a deposit, and he's ours on the 1st.

I think that we don't really know what we're getting into, but like having a baby, it's exciting. I'm pumped about it, and so is the wife. I'm sure the boy is, too, but he's a little too young to fully understand what's going on.

Well, now that I've already posted one picture, how about some more? I realized that I've never given you all confirmation that I graduated, so here you go...

Speaking of that, I just got my grade card back: four classes, three A's and an A-plus. Over the year, my GPA is 4.0. Not that I'm bragging (okay, I am a little bit), but hey, it's pretty good.

Since I haven't published a posting to the boy's blog in recent memory, here are a couple of photos to keep you up to speed, the second of which is from those days not-so-long-ago when we were plowing through two feet of snow...

I heard a stat a little while back that the average father spends about 11 minutes a day of quality time with his kid. I didn't really believe it, until now. Right across the driveway from our townhouse is the playground in our complex. Handy and accessible for us, it's true. As I'm typing (I'm getting the bulk of this done early today because I've got time now and I won't necessarily have it later), there's a guy there with his son, who can't be older than two. Cute little guy; looks and acts a lot like our boy, which is why I kept looking. At first, the kid was playing on his own while the dad sat on the nearby bench, not looking at his kid at all. The kid was obviously trying to get the dad's attention, but the guy wouldn't even look up. Later, when I looked out again, the dad had ventured near the kid, who was now playing some sort of imaginative game and hoping the dad would play along. But then I noticed what the dad was doing--playing with his iPod. So here he is with earphones in both ears, paying more attention to the gadget than the kid. So sad.

Just now, they walked away, with the dad still looking at his infernal iPod, and the kid still talking away. Just before they passed from sight, the kid held out his hand for the dad to grab, and the dad didn't even see it. Just kept on walking.

Why do I even mention this here? Because it makes me sad. I wish that, as a gender, we men would do more for our kids. I wish that we'd invest more time in them, that we'd stop the cycle of poor fathering and be brave enough to be men. My dad was brave enough to take that step with me, and look how it turned out. I hope that I can be brave too, even though I have a great example to follow.

I'm not a child psychologist, but I have a son, and I know that I am one of the most important people in his life. My reactions, my tone of voice, my interest level, all play a huge part in his development. I can see it in his eyes when he's looking for my approval, and I can feel his disappointment when he doesn't get it. Fathering is an awesome responsibility, and maybe if more of us men took it seriously, there would be less problems in the world.

Yes, I'm being utopian again. But would it really kill us as men to step up to the plate and be men, especially in our homes?

That's a bit of a tough note to end on, but I am nonetheless going to end on it. More tomorrow, including a possible update on the employment situation (I hope to hear from my prospective employer tomorrow, which would probably alleviate the sense of anxiety that I'm feeling right now, and that is manifesting itself in purchasing dogs. At this rate, we'll have a whole kennel by next week, so they'd better call fast). See you then.